THINGS TO RIDE IN AUSTRALIA (official):
- Kangaroo: DONE sort of. (small plastic carousel kangaroo, for 2-6 year olds.)
- Manta Ray: DONE came within 3 feet of one, so I'm gonna count it. Also, WTF?
- Killer Whale: chances: very likely
- Dolphin: chances: very probable, since I'm going to Shark Bay next week.
- Velociraptor: chances: very low, their backs are scaly and hard to climb.
- Naomi Watts: chances: you tell me. what's that you say? sure thing? agreed
- Wave: DONE easy. surfing is a lot harder than it looks, for everyone except me.
- Camel: chances: high, since Australia has the most wild camels of any place on earth.
- Emu: only so I can tire one out, wrestle it to the ground, and kill it. I hate emus.
In closing, this is what one kilogram of bacon looks like:
MMMM. Alright, l8r.
No worries (actually maybe a little worrying about the risk of heart disease),